Even So

The street is steady and the lights are fixed
their glow projects between the yellow lines
the rain dissolves within a fragile mist
And I am here pretending to be fine

My arms now bear the weight of tight curled fists
My eyes are veiled as though they’ve drawn the blinds
Irrational perhaps – there is no risk
but fear is in the fabric of my mind

(You said that you could love me still like this)

My legs are shaking as they take a step –
that simplest thing that they were meant to do
My thoughts have long ago outrun their depth
with spun projections that could not be true

Just what the fear encircles I don’t know
The mind and body still elude control
But in the past I feared a different foe
That I could not be loved if not quite whole

(You say you love me even so)

With trembling steps I cross the street
I feel my anxious self a sham
And yet at my most small and weak

You say,       

You love me as I am

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